(Justice Feelgood Marshall remains weirded out by talking about himself in the third person, but the standards of journalism demand it and he is nothing if not a Serious Journalist.)
In a 20 minute men’s exhibition, the New York Shock Exchange meted out some severe punishment to the Harm City Homicide, opening up with 36 unanswered points on their way to a rout of the home team, 97-14.
From the first couple of jams it was apparent that the Homicide might be in some trouble, as leadoff Shock Exchange jammer Jonathan R lapped leadoff Homicide jammer Justice Feelgood Marshall twice in an opening 10-0, and Gordon Gekko added a few more with a 13-0 over Virginia Slim on Jam 2. By the time the Shock Exchange’s Rinkworm jumped on the pile by adding a 13-0 of his own on Jam 3, it was 36-0 and it seemed possible that the Homicide might not get on the board at all — however, when Gordon Gekko went to the box during his opening pass in Jam 4, the Homicide blockers seemed to have much more success focusing on offense, allowing Homicide jammer Justice Feelgood Marshall to get the crowd riled up with an 11-0 jam that brought the score to 36-11. The Homicide managed to keep the next couple of jam scores close, as Jonathan R called off a quick 4-0 over a rapidly closing Virginia Slim and Rinkworm had to do the same on a 1-0, bringing the score to Shock Exchange 41, Homicide 11 with about 10 minutes left in the bout.
Harm City Homicide’s Carpe Demon tries to line up a shot on Shock Exchange jammer Rinkworm. Photo credit: epmd_derby
It proved to be only a short respite, though, and Shock Exchange would drop their 3 biggest jams as the 20 minutes came to an end. Gordon Gekko ran up a big 14-0 on Virginia Slim, and while Justice Feelgood Marshall got a few more points on the board for Homicide on the following jam, it still went to the Shock Exchange overall as Jonathan R won a 7-3 jam that made the score Shock Exchange 62, Homicide 14. New York pulled out an entirely new weapon here, letting Teen Wolf take a trip to the jammer line against Deustch Bag, and Teen Wolf was able to put up 14 more points with the help of a trip to the box by Deustch Bag. On the bout’s final jam, Deustch Bag passed the helmet star to Justice Feelgood Marshall upon being released from the box, but no sooner had Justice started his opening pass that he found himself sent to the penalty box on a truly unique cutting track major. Without a Homicide jammer on the track, Gordon Gekko was able to drop 5 point lap after 5 point lap against a tiring Homicide defense, and by the time the penalty was over Gekko had already put up 21 points. Justice was able to get the hometown crowd to blow up one more time when Gekko, incorrectly believing that the bout was ending on the period clock rather than the jam clock, began prematurely celebrating to the crowd and left himself open for a blindside hit, but the Homicide would not be able to put any more points on the board.
Gordon Gekko led the Shock Exchange with a remarkable 48 points in 4 jams, notching an average of 12 points per jam, while Justice Feelgood Marshall was the offensive output for Homicide with 14. Homicide was given 47 minors and 1 major, while Shock Exchange got 31 minors and 2 majors. New York took lead jammer on 9 of the 10 jams of the period, while Homicide only pulled it once; there were no jams with no lead jammer.